On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
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you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
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I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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