If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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