Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
