he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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