You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
