singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
im six kinds of drunk right now
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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