have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
