Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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