There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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