I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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