Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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