I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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