whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
She said her name was "party"
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
