No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize