Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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