Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
