Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I've blown a few things in my day
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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