So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
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well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
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TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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