I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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