That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
