Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I didn't shave. On purpose
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I forget how to act sober
Randomize