have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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