Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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