So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
