i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
