Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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