i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
and you said cock pushups were impossible
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
