Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
