Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
