her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Randomize
