I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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