So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
