Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
as a side note pls kill me
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize