so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
