She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
