isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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