I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
