Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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