No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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