Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
