Dual....:-)
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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