This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
