lets start a swedish sibling band together
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize