I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
