i was born a porn star she said
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
is wine microwaveable?
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
