I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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