I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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