i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
