I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize