He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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