You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I can't turn off my feet"
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it